Indy posted today about the top 10 scariest elements in designing the ultimate ghost story. I started thinking about what makes a good ghost story, mixed in with Otto's favorite topic, what makes a good horror movie. With those in mind, I started contemplating what frightens me. Number 4 on my list is a body of bottomless water. Ponds, Lakes, Rivers, Seas, Oceans, etc.
I have never almost drowned and it is safe to say I have not drowned. On the other hand, perhaps I am and you are reading a Ghost blog....BWAAAAHAHAHA! Seriously, dude, what has caused this innate fear of bottomless water? I'll tell you two things that have...
1. JAWS. You want a reason to keep small children from watching graphic movies here you go. My mother used to argue with me that there was not a great white shark at the deep end of the pool. I would go to the lake and stay in the boat because we all know that some sharks, like the bull shark, can adapt to freshwater. If not sharks, the news is always talking about alligators and crocodiles popping up in local lakes. We have had at least three in the KC area in the past two years. I watch Shark Week and I see what happens to those poor people. I am not setting myself up. If something is going to come out of the water and bite my ass, it had better be Nessie.
We took the kids to San Diego in April and while at Sea World, I remembered how uneasy sharks make me. We went to the shark exhibit and rode the conveyor belt under the tank. I kept one eye on the seams for any leaking water and the other on the end of the line, calculating what fools were going to move out of my way as I make a Constanza-styled break for the exit. (Unlike George, my wife and kids go before me.)
2. CREEPSHOW 2's THE RAFT: Every time I have been on a floating dock with some hot 80's chicks, I think of The Sludge. It could get me in the water; it could come up through the boards. The point is it is a dark evil substance coming up out of dark water. I cannot see it sneaking up to bite my ass.
The rational person is going to say, "Oh, you're just being paranoid about those silly things. They're just movies." I say to them, "You don't know what's at the bottom. Have you been down there and looked around? Do you know what lurks beneath? I don't think so."
