I’ve always been a very patient person. Perhaps because I was such a slacker and always lived 20 minutes after the clock. Now that I’m more responsible, I’m losing my patience. I think it’s from trying to tackle a full time job, full time parenting and full time school. If I have a spare moment to breathe, then something is not getting accomplished.
For those who can relate, my job is like working for a toy company during the Christmas season. Take a 16-hour hell day from there and apply it to an 8-hour day, 5 days a week. I’ve only slowed down this week because I’m entering vacation mode. One week until my first vacation in 2 years.
I’m not going to bitch about parenting; it’s actually a blast. If you don’t have kids, you won’t understand it until you do. It’s tiring and I won’t lie. However, when my 8 year old gives me some smartass remark back, I tend to laugh because it’s clever. The only time I get pissed off is when she pisses her mother off…that makes my life harder and so she needs to stop. Well, I do lose my patience when she doesn’t do what I tell her to do when I tell her to do it. (For future parents, practice this sentence: “You will do what I tell you to do when I tell you to do it”)
School is another issue. I have little patience for professor’s who waste my time. I’m a busy man and I am paying money to learn. I do not have time for you to drone on and on about your personal life so that the class lasts the full 7 hours. Get to the point and let us go early, I have other shit to do this weekend. I also do not have patience for you to drone on for 2 hours without a break. I need to piss and stretch, stick to the schedule and let us break every hour.
I have another 4 weeks to go in my Connectivity class, and the professor is done lecturing. We will have three more open book/open note tests and that is it. 4 weeks. Why the hell am I in this class?
I really started thinking about this after work yesterday. We went to pick up my youngest daughter from daycare and another parent’s car had died. She’s a single mother so of course we feel bad. We try jumping it. Nothing. We call our insurance company for the free tow. They say they will be there in 20 minutes. 45 minutes later they show up. The whole time, I’m wrestling with myself. In the past, I’d have no problem being helpful and not complaining. But now, I just want to get home, eat and relax.
I think I was showing impatience because Michelle started apologizing profusely and telling us we didn’t have to stick around. That’s when I started feeling like an asshole. This poor lady is having a shitty day, her car dies and she probably doesn’t have the money to fix it. I’m being some impatient prick, pacing around the car and constantly looking at her engine like my evil gaze will make the fucking thing work. My evil gaze makes the kid clean up her room, why can’t this car be intimidated into starting?
I’ve been so tightly wound lately, sometimes feeling like I’m going to have a heart attack before I turn 30. I’m really hoping that my vacation relieves a lot of stress. I’m promising myself to slow it down a bit. Stop and enjoy what’s going on. Once I realized I was just being impatient yesterday, I actually noticed how beautiful it was outside.
My apologies to everyone I have been impatient with lately. One more week until my vacation.
